Barney loves apples. But Barney isn't happy with the standard of apples in London. He says they're floury. Or too soft. Or too hard. He can taste chemicals. He can taste the people who touched the apple on its journey to him. He can taste the supermarket guy. He can taste the woman that picked the apple. She's a back-packer from Holland. She went out drinking the night before and fell asleep in some guy's room . The guy owned a bloodhound. He had a pile of socks in the corner and listened to Bob Marley.